The Drawbacks Of The Indirect Approach
by Mr. Peabody Hawke
Summary: Sokka really sort of sucks at this whole communication thing. [TophSokka]


_ie: Why, yes, I CAN write het. :D I love this pairing no end. I actually started writing this last summer (meaning, yes, back before Serpent's Pass ever aired), but this is about average for how long it takes me to finish things. XP  
Obviously some level of AU here, jumping the whole "Zuko's joined the party" bandwagon. You can decide why/when/whether it takes place during show-canon or several years in the future to ease your little brains over age-squick issues. Doesn't matter as far as the plot of the fic is concerned._

**The Drawbacks Of The Indirect Approach**

---------

"You got yourself stuck again," said Toph when she arrived.

Sokka wasn't sure whether it was a question or a statement. Perhaps it was neither.

"This is the third time I've had to dig your ass out of a crevasse today," she continued, pulling him out of the rock without ever touching him. "I know you're an idiot, but I didn't think you were that incompetent."

"Um," said Sokka.

Toph, obviously, didn't know much about Looks, with that capital L, but Sokka thought she had "Disdainful" pretty much mastered.

"I guess the heat's getting to your head or something," she said after a moment, and turned back to camp. "Pansy water tribe types."

"Heh," said Sokka.

She was already gone, but she wouldn't have been able to see the expression on his face anyway.

---------

"Sokka's stuck again," said Zuko.

Toph kept peeling her apple. "Aang can get him."

"The Avatar is too busy making eyes at Katara."

"I can't say the phrase 'making eyes' means anything to me, but I get your point." She sliced a wedge from the fruit and popped it in her mouth. "Though I am surprised to be hearing it from you, of all people."

Zuko shrugged - she could feel his weight shift with his shoulders. "Hard to ignore these things when you're surrounded by pining lovebirds."

"There's only two of them. What am I, chopped liver?"

Zuko said nothing, but Toph got the feeling it was supposed to be a poignant silence.

"If you're trying to convey something through your expression, as I am told you types are apt to do, you might want to rethink your method a little."

"You're awfully observant for someone who can't see." He didn't even have the good grace to sound sheepish, but then again, he was Zuko. Before she could make a snide reply about people who were obsessively ambitious and still accomplishing the square root of bug all, he added, "But you don't catch everything."

"What's _that_ supposed to mean?" she scowled. She hated vague comments like that. It usually meant people were trying to get their point across in a manner she couldn't see. It also meant their point was probably incredibly stupid. "Of course I don't catch everything. Is there something specific I've been missing that you'd like to let me in on?"

"For the sake of my own dwindling sanity: no, not really."

"Mind buggering off, then?"

"Not at all." As he walked away, he added without turning: "Sokka's still stuck, by the way."

She may or may not have cursed.

---------

The first time Sokka got stuck was an accident.

The second time Sokka got stuck was also an accident. Really.

The third time Sokka got stuck may or may not have been an accident.

The fourth time Sokka got stuck, he was wedged between distinctly avoidable boulders in the middle of an otherwise open stretch of ground.

"Now, did you fall into this one, or was there simply no other way around?"

"They snuck up on me, actually."

"I'm not even going to ask how."

"That's probably for the best."

"I shouldn't ask why, either, should I?"

"Tried and true method," Sokka answered cheerfully. "Why deviate from what works?"

"Because it's getting a little obvious, even for you."

"It is?" He sounded hopeful.

"Yes, it's obvious that you're an idiot. Whatever you're up to, there's got to be a better way of doing it."

"Probably, but this one is less likely to get me beaten up."

"You're such a wimp."

There was a pause as they regarded each other, even though technically only one of them could see. Sokka shifted slightly. "You're not going to get me out, are you."

"I was thinking of letting you roast there, actually. Then maybe you won't be so quick to go get yourself stuck again."

"What if I begged and groveled a bit?"

Toph leaned back against one of the boulders in a position that said she wasn't inclined to move a whole lot sooner than the rock itself was. "Couldn't hurt to try."

"Please, O Divine Mistress of the Earth–"

Toph kicked off from the rock. "Okay, that's enough."

Sokka looked injured. "But I didn't even get to the good part yet."

"You're trying to sway me by melting my brain out my ears, and I rather value my brain where it is, thanks."

"And what is wrong, might I ask, with one's brains leaking out one's ears?" he asked haughtily.

"It'd probably make me look like you, for one thing."

"If only you were so lucky."

"All right, that's it." She started to walk away.

"Hey, wait, Toph, come back! Where're you going? Lemme out, what'd I do? Toph, c'mon!" He continued to voice futile protests for her entire retreat, struggling with the boulders and cursing himself for being genuinely stuck.

When she had just about left the plateau, she stomped her foot and Sokka was forcibly ejected from his prison between the boulders and deposited rather painfully on the ground. By the time he'd groaningly picked himself up and accounted for his bruises, she was already gone.

---------

"Sokka's looking for you," Zuko said in monotone as he wandered by.

"What, does he want to inform me ahead of time that he's going to get stuck again? You can tell him I'm not going to get him out of this one."

Zuko turned and glared at her. "I am _not_ playing matchmaker for you two," he said in a tone that suggested he would much rather concede victory to his sister and be her humble servant for the rest of his days.

"_What?_" screeched Toph, and anyone else would have known this voice meant trouble. But only anyone else would have cared.

"You lovebirds sort it out for yourselves, and try to keep it private. I don't want to know." He started to walk away, muttering something about being surrounded by stupid teenage hormones and nobody having a sense of duty anymore.

He only got about four steps before the ground jerked out from under him and he landed on his back. An instant later he had rolled back to his feet and was crouched in a fighting stance, his best glare wasted on a girl who could neither see his expression nor gave a damn whether she'd damaged his pride. She stood at the ready, feet slightly splayed, fists balled at her sides. They faced off for several seconds, silently daring each other to try it.

Toph twisted her heel in the dirt, and Zuko dodged the eruption of ground where he'd stood and simultaneously shot a fireball at her in return. A wall of rock blocked it and disintegrated, and Zuko had to backflip to evade two more pillars that came bursting up to pin him.

"Hey!" yelled an angry voice, and Sokka came bursting from the trees, waving his boomerang threateningly at Zuko. "Don't you touch her!"

Both parties turned to glare at him as he jogged up, but he took no notice. "What do you think you're doing? I knew we shouldn't have trusted you! You're–"

The ground buckled beneath his feet and he landed in a heap for the second time that day, his tirade derailing into a protesting yelp.

Toph marched over to where Sokka was sprawled in an undignified mess on his back and planted one foot firmly on his chest. "What the _hell_, Snoozles?" she snapped, glaring down at him with eyes that burned anger every bit as fiercely for all that they couldn't see. "Who gave you permission to just butt in on somebody else's fight, huh?"

"Toph, I wasn't–" he tried, but she wasn't allowing him any defense.

Zuko rolled his eyes and took this as an opportunity to beat a hasty – but dignified – retreat. Toph graciously chose to ignore his escape in favor of yelling at the rather cowed young man she had pinned to the ground.

"What, do you think you're my _protector_ or something? Do you think I can't take care of myself? Is that what you think?"

"I was just trying to–"

"To what? To _save_ me? The guy who gets wedged between boulders and needs saving himself every three hours? That's pretty rich!"

Sokka kept quiet at that one.

"If I feel like having a bit of a brawl, then that's what I'm gonna do, so just _stay out_ of my business, Sokka!"

"But I like being a part of your business," Sokka said in a dejected sort of tone, and if Toph had been able to see, at that moment she would have been subjected to a polar-bear-puppy look that was all the more powerful on account of being utterly sincere.

There was a pause. Toph's foot didn't budge from Sokka's chest.

"You really sort of suck at this communication thing," she said finally.

Sokka would have shrugged if his shoulders hadn't been pinned to the ground. "Saying the right thing at the right time has never really been my style."

"'Smooth' just isn't in your vocabulary," Toph agreed. She removed her foot and stepped back. "All right, Snoozles, get up and tell me what this is about."

He clambered to his feet and dusted himself off, feeling guiltily grateful that she couldn't see so that she wouldn't know how red his face was. "I, uh, well, you see…" he began eloquently.

She tapped her foot ominously.

Sokka smacked a palm to his face. "Geez, why was it so much easier with Yue and Suki?"

The foot stopped tapping as Toph froze. "This is a _what_ now?" she demanded.

"Ah, I'm not sure that there's a good word for it–"

"A _proposition?_"

"Oh, yeah. That."

"After _that_ track record, you're propositioning _me?_"

Sokka's expression morphed into one of indignance. "Hey! I didn't mean to upset you, but that's no reason to–"

"'Cause if you're gonna decide later that you're cursed and all the girls you kiss are subjected to some horrible fate and you don't wanna put me through that, then you might as well get it over with and kiss me now so I can kick fate's ass and we can move on to the good stuff."

"I… wait, what?"

"You owe me. If you weren't so damn hopeless at dropping hints, we coulda gotten this cleared up a lot sooner."

Sokka stared.

Toph glared at him. "Don't tell me you're having second thoughts already."

"You're not going to brain me with a rock?" he said hopefully, as though he were just now realizing such an outcome was possible.

"I will if you don't hurry up and kiss me already."

His face broke out in a grin, then was interrupted as his features twisted into a thoughtful expression. It looked painful. "…What was that about me being cursed?"

Toph poignantly stepped on his foot.

He took the hint.


End file.
